Hmm, I'ma leave my opinion here, it might not be exactly what you probably want to hear.
Unfortunately, there is no perfect way to deal with social media, forum, patience, and such. Open speech is fine, but wrong words are like nuclear bomb. Once released, there's no turning back.
This is why many community became so overly strict, and blindlessly managing the forum wrongly. Or, perhaps we're the ones that are blind, and were not listening to what the forum rules are. However... The other obvious reason for this is the lack of information. Why must there such a rule in the first place, why must we listen to -- but without any description, and what it does to resolve anything? Some of us won't listen if we weren't convinced. Sometimes users were just kicked out or banned just like that, after crossing merely a line.
Does it not make you angry if a boss tells you to do this, and do that, but without giving out any reason -- except "trust me", over, and over. Well I guess that's fine if you get paid well, or a rule saying "No questioning, everything is confidental." -- Wait, this isn't a good example, but yeah.
It so happened that in one of the forums I visited were strict. Absolute poor management, such as they really should have left a giant sentence "Search before posting any questions." inside the search bar, but there isn't -- literally I have to say that to many newly signed users because they never look up before asking anything -- which it can be plainly frustrating to repeat words over and over. They also have an unwritten rule -- yes, it wasn't written anywhere within the forum rules -- that you shouldn't act like a moderator. I got a warning after that, and I ended up opposing them with this unwritten rule of theirs.
Thus I am not sure which is right, or wrong. Arguing in forums is thoroughly frowned from what I've experienced so far. But sometimes, leaving every cases to moderators can be rather harsh towards ones that tries to help, could even an indication of building up hatred for some.
Well, if it can avoid certain casualties, I guess moderators and administrators can act like a hero themselves to become the target instead. It can be scary.... But it's mostly hidden to many of us. But this can also cause problems for the managers themselves -- as words are easily spread across the webs like a virus.But I am surprised that moderators, like Art himself, joins in instead. I've been trying hard to maintain myself and patience, even thought I feel great to be participating this forum. I'll give myself away if I lose myself...
Yeah it seems you're right, most of us here seems to have mental issue -- I have chronic depression, by the way. Kudos!