[HS]

[LOCKSUIT]

eyes

[Art]

Are they really stars?

[HS]

[Art]

This is worth watching. Some funny made-up conversations ensue but watch the bystanders' reactions!

https://www.chonday.com/39409/a-funny-compilation-of-awkward-conversations/

[Art]

Sometimes we like to hear a clever pun and other times we cringe at them.

Here, you can pick and choose from so many of them they could be a song.
OK...they are part of a song by this clever gal! Funny stuff but one needs to listen carefully.

[LOCKSUIT]

Once your back slacks, you won't ever go back! :D

Always cracks me up, right up the spine!!

[LOCKSUIT]

It was the year 2050 and there was a muscle contest. There were 10 men, one of which was a man made machine.

He won the contest. Everyone went up to him and asked him how he managed to hold up 200 pounds on 1 leg while balancing a glass on his leg for 5 days straight. He said "I just locked in my joints when the angle was right. It took 0 energy!! I also shut down my body to Off mode. No sweat. Ready for the next contest!".

[Art]

Husband:    My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home.

Officer:    Age? 

Husband:    I'm not sure. Somewhere between 50 and 60.  We don't do birthdays.

Officer:   Height? 

Husband:     I'm not sure.  A little over five-feet tall.

OFFICER :   Weight?

Husband:     Don't know.  Not slim, not really fat.

OFFICER :    Color of eyes?

Husband:    Sort of brown I think  Never really noticed.

OFFICER :    Color of hair?

Husband:   Changes a couple times a year.  Maybe dark brown now. I can't remember.

OFFICER :    What was she wearing?

Husband:    Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts.  I don't know exactly.

OFFICER :    What kind of car did she go in?

Husband:     She went in my truck.

OFFICER :    What kind of truck was it?

Husband :    A 2017, manufactured September 16th, pearl white Ram Limited 4X4 .with 6.4l Hemi V8 engine ordered with the Ram Box bar and fridge option, led lighting, back up and front camera,

Moose hide leather heated and cooled seats, climate controlled air conditioning.  It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, Weather Tech floor mats. Trailing package with gold hitch,

sunroof, DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio, Cobra 75 WX ST 40-channel CB radio, six cup holders, 3 USB ports, and 4 power outlets.  I added special alloy wheels and off-road Toyo tires. 

It has custom retracting running boards and under-glow wheel well lighting.

  At this point the husband started choking up.

OFFICER   :    Take it easy sir,      We'll find your truck.

[Freddy]

Very good

[LOCKSUIT]

Sort of interesting how a truck can be a full mobile home with food, shelter, wife, and full GPS navigation for mingling with the global hive. Did you write that joke Art?

[Art]

No Lock, Sorry to say that I got it passed on to me from a friend.

I did, however, laugh to myself when I read it! 

[LOCKSUIT]

came across this

[HS]

[krayvonk]

when you grow up you realize your life is about winning dancing competitions, and when the other guy says "its silly as hell doing this" you  just say back to him "you just counted yourself out the crown of big man dancing" and keep jiving for them crazy grips.

Im finding some of these jokes that arent that good dont get past green level and it doesnt work on anyone.